By Sandrea: Mygripe
This is a story that is so unbelievable that I have to gripe about it. I do not believe that anyone is going to read this story and think it is true they will undoubtedly say that this is fictitious because it beggars believe
I happen to come across an individual a couple of years ago and since then a story has emerge that beggars belief and I need to share.
A man lived with a woman for over nine years during this period the relationship soured, the woman wanted out of the relationship as she felt that she did not love the man anymore and she did not want to stay in a loveless relationship, but the man kept on doing all that he can to keep the relationship together. she got fed up with him packed her bags and left him.
Needless to say the man literally fell apart, when she left ,so he turned to his friend for comfort. His friend was willing to give him all the advice and help she could and for months after the girlfriend when she was his rock, his confidant and she helped to put him back on his feet. Then suddenly, six months after his acrimonious break up he informed his friend that he was seeing another woman and in fact he had moved in with this other woman. Shock was hardly the words she could used to say how she felt when he told her of this. How could he get past the agony and devastation he undergo so quickly in order for him to begin another relationship.
It seems infantile and stupid but as a friend you support them even if you believe what they are doing is wrong, and although his friend support him she told him in no uncertain terms that this was counter-productive and the relationship was too soon. But he was adamant that he loved this woman and in fact roughly six months after they met, he held an engagement part – very stupid.
Then approximately nine months into the relationship he came back complaining that his relationship was once again falling apart, this so called woman that he hurriedly got engaged to, to prove to his previous girlfriend that he was over her, started treating him badly. She stop having physical relationship with him. He started staying out late at nights so that he would not have to go home and face the the fact that she could not stand him and that physically he repulse her.
Then suddenly the current girlfriend realised that she had a goldmine because he would give her anything she wanted just so he could continue his unhealthy relationship, so she coerce him into getting her pregnant and after the pregnancy she distant herself away again, no more physical contact, but he worked like a dog to give her everything that she needed.
He constantly burdened his friend with everything that was going on in his life, and two years as passed since the birth of their child and he said that this woman that he is residing with has had no sex with him from the time she got pregnant and the subsequent birth of the child this amounts to almost three years.
I could not believe this, and I know that you are reading this thinking to yourself this man must be the biggest idiot that is on this planet or he is a saint. But upon further investigation it has emerge that the reason that he his in the situation is that he would rather live the lie, than allow his parents, his sisters and his former girlfriend, who happens to live not far from where he currently lives, to believe he has failed at another relationship.
The interesting factor about all this is that the previous girlfriend told a number of people that this individual does not know how to let go off a relationship, even when she was with him she wanted to leave so badly that she had an affair with another man and although he knew that she had a sexual relationship with someone else, he was willing to overlook the affair so he could hold on to her, in the end she really despise him that’s why she left.
I doubted this at first until, I could prove that not only his everything the truth, but he started an affair with someone else just so that he could continue the lie he was living. What he was not aware of is the strength of this other female. so when he kept lying to her about leaving and continued to stay she dropped him like hot brick. Now he’s in a position that he cannot let go off the woman he started the affair with and he cannot leave the one he has the child with because he has to pretend that his life with her is stable and happy. But each day he’s dying a little bit at a time.
Having lost the one person that he could gripe about his situation with he seems to be going insane, as he cannot tell anyone else about this unhealthy relationship that he’s living and he certainly doesn’t want other friends and associate to know that a man can live with a woman who is not sick, as no disabilities and yet they have no physical contact for three years, it is the shame of his current situation that could put him in a mental institution.
When will people learn that relationships is about caring and sharing dreams, hopes, fears, and aspirations, planing a future together. If and when those ingredients are no longer in a relationship, and although sex should not be the be all and end all of a relationship, it is the lynch pin that gel the union together and when that aspect of the relationship dies then one should call it a day.
Tips:
- Do not hang on to a bad relationship
- Have the courage to move on with your life, there is always better out there
- Do not allow children to trap you in an unhealthy relationship
- It is counter-productive to remain in any relationship when clearly it is dead
- Love yourself first and foremost then you have the capacity to love someone else
- Self esteem is the corner stone of a great relationship without self esteem you become a door mat
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