Cheating is the worst thing that can happen in a relationship. This is the ultimate betrayal of the trust that is placed in another human being.
When a relationship begins the first few months is where you build up trust, confidence and values. We try everything to make sure that we are compatible with the other person and then most will take it to the level where sexual intercourse becomes part and parcel of the relationship.
A prostitute will sell her body for money and therefore the sex that happen there is what I like to call ‘out of body experience’, because she has to detached herself from what she is doing in order to continuously do the same thing over and over again. However when sex is being undertaken in a relationship atmosphere then clearly there is a difference, because you are offering yourself intimately to another person and you trust this person to be faithful to you.
So when your partner or husband for that matter undertake a relationship outside of the marital home is bad enough but when the person that they undertake that relationship with is a member of your own family the betrayal is twice more difficult to swallow more so than if it was with someone that you do not know.
Imagine having your sister having an affair with your husband or partner and then having the gall to tell you, once the affair comes to light that you do not deserve your other half and she is better for him that you could ever be.
The unmitigated effrontery of some people is unbelievable. First of all there is no way in hell that your sister should be looking at your husband in any sexual manner; she should see that man has her brother. How can you deal with this ultimate betrayal that a family member has ripped apart your life, your family and your future?
I am trying to wrap my head around what actions would I take if this was to happen to me and I realise that if you were to do bodily harm to either of these people they would win. First they would have stolen your trust, and then they would have allowed you to most likely end up in prison for them and they are not worth the bother. If they can betray you so easily then they are not worth you exercising any energy on them.
I can understand the indignity that you may feel and the fact that most likely friends and other family will eventually find out about what has happen will undoubtedly put more pressure on you and the decisions that you make so before you do something stupid just remember these tips.
- Do not allow him to talk you back into forgiving him
- If he can cheat with your sister then he will cheat with anyone who let him
- Speak to someone who will listen to you without judging you
- Do not let anyone tell you that you are the cause for the deed that has been done
- Remember that you are the victim
- If adult children are in the relationship, be the first to tell them what has happen
- Do not try finding excuses to blame yourself, that is self defeating
- Do not find any reasons to justify is bad behaviour, this is counter -productive
This kind of betrayal does not only happen to women they equally occur to men as well there are women out there that will have affairs with member of their other half family. I cannot for the life of me understands why anyone would want to consider going through an entire family.
If you are in the group that this is happening to do not feel ashamed this was never your making it is the making of two unscrupulous individual that has no conscience and care only for their own gratifications over those that they at one time profess that they love.