By Sandrea
Recently a friend of my told me a story that I believe would be an interesting guideline to individuals experiencing the same or similar situation and having asked her permission to write this story so that readers can decide if it has any beneficial information.
So here goes, let call my friend Christine, she has been having an affair with a man for the last four years. The relationship started off as them being friends, when the man girlfriend of nine years walked out on him he began to fall to pieces and she was the shoulder he needed to cry on, he told her about the pain he was going through and she gave him advice and comfort.
Then roughly six months after the girlfriend left him he informed Christine that he met another woman and he was moving in with her. She could not believe what she was hearing considering that he has not gotten past the first break up she was surprised he was even considering moving in with another woman, then he dropped a bomb by saying that they were getting engaged, she was dumbfounded.
Well one year down the road he was back again complaining that this relationship was fallen apart the woman was no longer having physical relationship with him and he did not know what to do. This when on for a while then he told her that the woman said she wanted to have a child, and being the fool he is he allowed himself to get her pregnant and then he complain that from she became pregnant they had no more physical contact.
His constant complain when on for a while and she cannot explain whether it was sympathy or out of a sense of feeling sorry for him but she started an affair with this man and now he’s clinging to her has if his life depended on her but he’s still living with the woman who he claimed that they are not being physical with each other.
I have told her in no uncertain terms that she has to close the door on this relationship because it is very unhealthy. From what I gather he’s using her to maintain a facade with the woman he lives with. He does not want his previous girlfriend to know that he has failed at another relationship and he certainly his hiding the facts from his family so to continue living a lie he’s using her for the part of the relationship that his not being fulfilled at home and he can still stay in that ridiculous relationship and he believes that he can live the lie over and over again.
His world will eventually come crashing down on him, especially now that she told me that she has had no physical contact with him for the last six months and he’s getting really frustrated.
What would possess a person to want to live like that, relationship is about sharing and caring for each other and if that part of the relationship is dead then the whole relationship is over.
Having heard this story I hope my friend has taken my advice and really shut the door, because she is preventing herself from finding happiness with someone because he’s has taken too much of her time and space and she need to cut him loose. If anyone has the same or similar story you need to put an end to these kinds of unhealthy relationships.
TIPS
- Do not allow yourself to be used for any reason or purpose
- Get out of a relationship the minute you realise that it is unhealthy
- Do not allow yourself to be the link that keep a weak chain from falling apart
- Close the door firmly on any relationship that does not offer you love, respect and happiness
- Keep yourself esteem high and that way you will know when you are been jerked about
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